Engaging the Great Creator

This is really it when it comes down to it. In summary, The Artist’s Way is essentially the simple process of engaging the Great Creator in discovering and recovering our creative powers. We seek to establish a workable connection with God.

This is the value of morning pages. Because we make it a habit to write during the in-between state of wakefulness and sleepiness, when the Unconscious is still in the ascendant, we build and daily strengthen this connection and flow to the well of our natural talent. By faith we collaborate with God.

When we abide with the Great Creator, we bloom. This is the metaphor of the Vine and the branches in the Gospel according to St. John, chapter 15. There needs to be a shift in the consciousness for creativity to flow. Our job is to clear the pathways. The Great Creator does the creating through us.  

My artist’s prayer and creed

I know that in one of the tasks, Julia Cameron invites us to write our own artist’s prayer. This one is mine, and I lift the words entirely from the Bible, from the Voice Bible translation. The shema I adapted here for myself.

Artist Prayer

Listen, Rico.

Jesus is the Eternal God.

Jesus is the One True God.

And you shall love Jesus with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength. You shall love all whom Jesus loves as you love yourself.

Our Father in heaven,

let Your Name remain holy.

Bring about Your Kingdom.

Manifest Your Will here on earth as it is manifest in Heaven.

Give us each day that day’s bread—no more no less.

And forgive us our debts as we forgive those who owe us something.

Let us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

For Yours is the Kingdom, and the Power, and the Glory for the Ages.

Jesus, let Your Kingdom be, and let it be powerful and glorious forever.

Holy Spirit, let me be Present with You. I love You. Amen.

Artist Creed

Before time itself was measured, the Voice was speaking.

The Voice was and is God.

This celestial Word remained ever present with the Creator;

His speech shaped the entire cosmos.

Immersed in the practice of creating,

all things that exist were birthed in Him.

His breath filled all things

with a living, breathing light—

A light that thrives in the depths of darkness,

blazes through murky bottoms.

It cannot and will not be quenched.

Having shared these, I don’t think I’ll have any problem using the word GOD during this round of TAW.

Into the water again

I am thinking that if ever we do go to the Duran family reunion for Christmas, and if we skip the usual, boring, staid, predictable Bible devotion on Christ’s birth, as if we’re all in first grade Sunday School, and if, by some miracle, I was allowed to sort of lead the devotion, which I doubt because Mama Z and Papa Z hate to be outshone, but if ever, I would ask this question: “How does your relationship with Christ look like from where you are now?”

The long form of the question is, and as you can see, it’s really directed to Mama Z and Papa Z more than any other persons, which I hope they’ll burst into a monologue each that would suffice for this year’s family devotion: “You’ve been walking with Jesus far longer than any of us in this room. What does it look like from there? From your spiritual vantage point, what have you learned about God for sure? I guess what I’m really asking is, what do you now know about God that you didn’t know when you were our age that might encourage us to keep walking with Jesus?”

I hope I remember to recite that question in that exact phrasing. I actually am genuinely curious how they would answer this. And I hope they’d be honest and not be superior.

I am beginning a journey of The Artist’s Way again, because today, 19 September 2025, I am so depressed, and have been for the past two weeks. What I really want to do is to finish reading all of Anne Rice’s novels before we leave for New Orleans in October. But I guess I need TAW. I’ve asked Argel for an I Ching reading, but he’s still in class in Benilde, so I’ll have to wait for his reply.

I got the idea for my Christmas question from the Introduction to The Complete Artist’s Way compilation. My intention for this round of TAW is true shadow work, real dark shadow work. Let’s see if I get to do it.

There are several addictions and dopamine compulsions that have plagued me as an adult, and really now I don’t mind blogging about this because it is 2025 and nobody, as in nobody, reads blogs anymore. 

I wish to recommit myself to daily morning pages, yoga, breath work, writing practice, lectio divina, vipassana, and a weekly artist date. I also hope to add nightly journaling and a quick yoga. I don’t know. I’ve been thinking. I know how it feels to be off-centre, to be dazed, to see the whole world through a grey haze. But when I do my practice, I feel more alive, alert, awake to the colours of the world. Can that Consciousness actually be my normal? And is that what it means to enter the flow of a creative life? And can it lead me to a life that’s free from addictions?

And so here I am. I will commit thirteen weeks to The Artist’s Way, another thirteen weeks to Walking in this World, and another thirteen weeks to Finding Water. If I have the stamina for it, I just might tackle Vein of Gold. Well, we’ll see. Thanks for reading.

Facing the fears and blurts

I reread the essay from Chapter 1 of The Artist's Way called Your Ally Within: Affirmative Weapons. You may be familiar with this work, where you write "I, (your name), am a brilliant and prolific artist" ten times in a row.

Then you list down the blurts that the inner censor brings up. You also do some detective work to see who in your past planted that specific negative thought into your belief system.

And then you proceed to dismantle it by converting the blurt into an affirmation, and using it as a ready weapon, so that any time the negative thoughts haunt again, we focus on the affirmations instead. (I did the exercise up to listing the negative blurts and detecting the culprit responsible for implanting these notions into my inner censor.)

In Patsy Rodenburg's book, "The Second Circle", she describes an exercise called Facing the Fear. You lie on your back with your legs propped up on a facing chair. The chair should be at the right height to comfortably support your calf muscles, so that your thighs can stay unclamped. Put a thin cushion under your head.

This position frees the breath to go deep and low in the body, and allows some unacknowledged emotions to be freed. You may cry, or laugh as the emotion is allowed expression.

Breathing deeply, you speak your fears with a clear voice. "I am frightened of..."

I did Patsy's exercise with the blurts, just openly speaking them into the air. I felt vulnerable, but strangely supported. I kept on with the exercise for as long as I needed. And soon, affirmations came to mind as I continued to breathe deeply, dismantling and nullifying the negative blurts.

When I was ready, I slowly got up and wrote these affirmations into my notebook. What a release to deal with fears this way.

Thank you for listening.

Your enemy within: core negative beliefs

I am rereading Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way: a spiritual path to higher creativity. In one of the essays, Julia lists 20 fears that mask as core negative beliefs.

In reviewing the sample list of commonly held negative core beliefs to "I can't be a successful, prolific, creative artist because..." I found one that felt especially true to me at the moment. Number 13. I will never have any real money. (Death is the Number 13 Card in the Tarot, and I pulled one recently and it was reversed...meaning I am stuck on an old issue. So this may well be it.)

I can't be a successful, prolific, creative artist because I will never have any real money.

Julia advised listening to blurts and converting them to affirmations, and interestingly, just last Saturday, I was at a Brahma Kumaris meditation center where we did exactly this exercise, and I felt good. Now I needed the exercise of prayer again. That as an enlivening session and a story for another day.

So, I took that core negative belief (number thirteen in Julia's list), a pen, and a piece of paper, and wrote for ten minutes. "Creator God, Eternal God, One True God, Dad... I am afraid of poverty. I am afraid of becoming impoverished. I am afraid of having no money to pay for bills and obligations. Please provide for me. Please comfort me. Dad, I feel that this is all my fault that we have no money, that you are somehow punishing me. But this is old beliefs about you. I don't believe in that god anymore, that was punitive and exacting and harsh. Please help me have faith..." and so on until my timer went off.

I like this exercise of wrestling a negative belief in prayer. I think it works for me.

photo credit BelieversChurchLeander.com

Protecting the artist child within

Friends, I am re-reading essays from TAW here and there. Today I encountered a funny quote from a blog called David At Raptitude. He wrote: "No one is a grownup at everything." I laughed when I saw the truth in his off-hand sentence. We can't demand too much of ourselves. We can't insist that we look like responsible adults to everyone in the world.

What I am also realizing is that on the other hand, I can insist on looking like an adult to my inner artist child. I can be an adult and take care of my inner child. So, while The Artist's Way is aimed at recovering and healing the child within, it is our Inner Parent that does that work.

We can't be grownups at everything, but we can be grownups towards our art.

Shadow Artists

I am reviewing some key essays in TAW, although not formally going through the book in a strict twelve-week basis.

Having reread the essay Shadow Artists, I realize humbly that all writers on this earth have social, economic, familial, and geographic realities that we must face, deal with, contend, engage every day--and yet still make art. It's a humbling realization, because now I can no longer resent this or that artist who just happened to be born to supportive parents who paid for acting classes or dance lessons or a singing coach, and drove their child to and from rehearsals. I am not that actor, although I am friends with actors who have that reality.

I have used resentment far too long as a block. I imagined that there is an ideal artist's life and that I don't have it, and that is why I am not successful or prolific. It's a victim mentality and it has crippled me far too long. To let go of it, I need to forgive myself for embracing that block, and to gently let it go.

All artists have their lives and realities. I am an artist with my own life and reality. It's not always easy, the path is often rocky and dirty, but this is my life, and in it I can and must create the art that wants to be created, because all artists before me, and around me, create in the lives they are in.

No more putting off creating until I get the fantasy artist life that I envisioned as ideal. In this life that I am in now, in whatever reality, I can create. I think this is what Julia meant when she said it is audacity that creates artists, not just talent. In the midst of my realities, I need to be audacious and create art, let go of resentment, and embrace the rich life I am given: I am a husband to a loving wife, I am a father to a spirited artist daughter. I did not finish school. I love reading and fiction. I have skills I need to learn, and will learn if I put in the time. My parents are middle-aged, and no, they were not supportive of my career choice, but that's just that. I can still create my art here and now.

Thanks for listening.

On being a shadow artist

So sa aking journey through TAW, ang aking week ay hindi seven days kundi one essay per day, maybe even one task per day. So talagang mas malalim, mas baby steps, or, to put it in meditation terms, mas mindful walking and aking approach.

Nandito na ako sa essay tungkol sa Shadow Artists, sa Week One.

"There, caught between the dream of action and the fear of failure, shadow artists are born."

If God created us to be creative, if God is our Parent who conceived us in Her womb, it must pain Him whenever we are blocked creatively.

I guess also, in this round of TAW, I shall more closely work with the idea that I am not alone in this. That I have God within me working with me. And sometimes God manifests as creative energy or spiritual electricity.


I need to know also, or admit to myself, that at this point in my life, especially in my theatre career when it was August since I last performed on stage, that I am returning to the shadowy cave of not creating, and so I need this course to keep me awake. I think of Aristotle's cave. And I want to awaken to greet the sunrise.

Brande's version

Ni-review ko ang Morning Pages at Artist Dates, ngunit imbes na TAW ang binasa ko, ang nireview ko ay ang mga chapters sa Becoming A Writer that pertains to these exercises.

Strangely, when I finished The Right To Write, I found myself writing freely, but also a better actor. And when I finished Vipassana, I found myself a better writer. I expected the inverse. That a course in writing will help me become a better writer; a course in breathing and sensations would help my inner actor. Hindi ganun ang ganap.

May sarili akong "Method" sa acting. So far it has only really worked for me. The people I shared it to thought it was too arduous a task. Pero since it works for me, I use it a lot when I'm stuck in a scene.

Pain

Masakit itong pinapasok kong ito.  Pero ganun talaga.  Masakit naman talaga.  Wala namang madali sa mundo.  This creative recovery thing means I'll need to deal with a lot of pain.  And for that I need God.

To turn my back on my idolatries aka my addictions, ouch!  Masakit. Pero I need this.  34 years old na ako.  Hindi na ako bata batuta na makikipag play games pa with God.  I need to take this addiction
seriously na.

May pagka clinical at classroom kasi ang demeanor ni Dorothea Brande. Yes, si Brande na talaga ang tinitignan kong Mother of Morning Pages and Artist Dates.  Pag binasa mo ang Becoming A Writer, nandun talaga yun.  BAW o TAW?  Ahem.  Mas sinabi si Brande about using your Logic
Self to provide a creative space for your Writer Self.  Sa tingin ko iyon ang totoong thrust ng TAW: to strengthen an Inner Parent that will nurture the creativity within.

At dahil sa pag-aaral ko ng Big History, medyo bukas ang isip ko na tanggapin na si YHWH at ang Creative Energy/Spiritual Electricity na sinasabi ni Julia, ay iisa lamang.